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Aim High Writing College Consulting

Student Loans, Beer Pong, and Campus Food: A Reluctant Book Review

10/13/2013

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From Left to Write asks reviewers to connect the book of the month with their personal experiences. Accordingly, this is not a traditional book review, but rather, my response to this month’s selection. Find out more here. I received an advance copy of Reasons Mommy Drinks for free, but I was not compensated in any way for this review. My comments are my own. This book is available for purchase here.
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I Don't Get It...

I kind of hated this book. However, I think it's important to acknowledge that the authors, Lyranda Martin Evans and Fiona Stevenson, weren't trying to annoy me. Moreover, I will readily admit that I am not a new mother, and so maybe I just didn't get it.

The format is simple: on the left page a complaint about motherhood, and on the right, a cocktail recipe designed to help you cope with things like trying not to break your baby, flying with an infant, and going to Disney World.

What was probably meant to be tongue-in-cheek just comes off as crude bellyaching.  

...But Maybe College Students, Past and Present Will

With little to go on, I thought the most relevant response I could hope to write would be an ode to the little annoyances particular to college life. Full disclosure - I had a pretty great undergraduate experience at the University of Notre Dame. Grad school at Harvard, however...well, another story for another time.

Past and Current Students, which of the following irritating aspects of  college life do you identify with?:


Lack of Sleep / Nap Time
Sometimes you feel like you work an overnight job, staying up until 2 or 3 to finish a paper, comfort a hysterical person you found sobbing in the dorm's hallway, or just because your roommates were all there and it seemed like a good time to watch the entire first season of Arrested Development.

And sometimes it feels like kindergarten, with everybody sneaking in a pre-nap lunch at 10:30, a post-lunch nap at 1:00, a pre-Political Science power nap at 2:30, and then a 30 minute pre-dinner nap at 5:30. This is not the real world. Enjoy it while you can.



Visitors / Houseguests
Your room is not really yours when you share it with anyone else. Most of the time visitors were a welcome distraction from homework. I met someone who became a good friend after he and some buddies traveled through our all-girls dorm around 10:30pm playing the bongos and ukulele, like some kind of Don Ho tribute band. 

I saw them outside our door, rolled my eyes, and then watched as my roommate invited them in. Turns out she knew Mr. Bongos from class. Unfortunately, he woke up our other roommate because, remember, somebody is always napping.

Not all drop-in guests are as enchanting. My glamorous first-year roommate brought in a constant stream of friends and overnight guests who made it clear I was the dorkiest dork who ever dorked. 


Everything Makes Her Cry
Who didn't know THAT girl who always hanging around, ready to tell you all the reasons that life was awful and she was miserable? She'd leave her room door open, ambushing innocent people walking down the hall and, being polite, accidentally inviting a loaded conversation by saying something like, "Hey, how are you?"

Note to these people: A "How Are You" tossed out when a person is still walking is generally rhetorical. Don't tell them about your lingering cold, relationship problems, and that weird fight you had with your boyfriend's mom.


You’re Sick
Of course you're sick. You live in confined quarters with a bunch of people who aren't getting enough sleep, are emotionally on-edge, and keep parading in a revolving door of visitors who add their germs into the mix as well. Expect a cold at least once every two months.


The Family Pet
What do you mean you can't keep a pet in the dorm?!

And no, our rectress' dog didn't count as our pet. 

My roommate's brother gifted her with the tiniest turtle. I wasn't too keen on hosting salmonella, but hey, it made her happy and nobody was forcing me to touch it. We named him "Popsicle" to remind ourselves and guests not to lick it. However, things took a turn for the devastating when Popsicle spiraled down into a deep depression and passed away over Christmas break. No more pets for us.


Ex-Boyfriends
Um, it is not fun to date in a setting where everybody knows everybody's business. It is not fun to call it quits with somebody and then run into him in the dining hall / student center / your friend's party. It is not fun to have someone expect a few dates means you are now in love and will marry upon graduation. It is not fun to date someone who has different preferences for social activities.  Beer pong is not a date.


The Weather
I went to school where it was -20 F for most of January and February. It was totally normal to suit up before your seven-minute trek across campus in two coats, a scarf wrapped up to your eyes, doubled-up gloves, and waterproof boots. You told your roommates you loved them, and if you weren't back in time for dinner...well, divide your possessions evenly.  


The Pediatrician
You're now in charge of your own health care. That's right. You make (and pay for) your own doctor's appointments. And remember, you're going to get sick pretty frequently. If you can afford dental, I'd like to know what sort of magical unicorn health plan your university is offering. I used to rely on Groupons and prayers to keep my teeth healthy.


Disposable Income
BAHAHAHAHAhahaha, that's funny.

There's no such thing when you carry a student loan.
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    Jessica Peyton Roberts 
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